ramble (Diane)

 His every thought grounds me
The non-participator
The one part of nothing but who sees all
In the past, its illuminator
His whole being devoted to his task
That no one else does
The lone investigator of a world
That without his probe would collapse
But someone will need it
Like I need his discipline
To reign me in
For I'm a silly actor of the time
Like all others I interact with
are, absent morality
Playing with their power
Coming up to breathe air when they can;
He always is
Born into such place as he was meant to be in
Where the air ever circulates
But there's no one else there.
I fling far high and low,
Reading angel signs in numbers
When I'm alone, too,
Forget him, then his every thought
I know will correct me
Like a cane or a word
A gaze so uncompromising
It never loses itself
And never indulges another
For it has to be
Someone has to be
Or else the realm would collapse
A door behind us would close
And we would be blind
And cut off from our hearts -
I see him but can't be him
Who has plentiful air but is indifferent to it
And he won't have me with him
I try to go on, in my personal life,
But I can't
Because I'd fall too far
Over the edge
Or, if lighted, damage what stands in my path
Like the rest
And be punished
For my careless transgressions -
Just a word
Is all that I need;
If you ever leave
I fear I'll forget myself,
Absent of a conscience I believed that I had
Or could easily find -
It's not so easy as that
And woe unto those
Who believe that it is

To me you are always in touch with the real
Somehow
Without going anywhere
And I
Am ever in a dream
Whether flung to the bottom
Or catapulted to the peak
The hard rock and seabed turn into a screen
When you speak
And I get my head on again
I speak ever like a projection
Of a faraway dream
I can't leave
All I meet are dream people
And not one can I keep
Throw water
Throw water
Turn the room dark
Expose that we sleep
I don't want to be here
Who I am
I want to touch the true world
But I never can
Because I love too much
My own self
And power
And that's an animal
Truth cannot find me
And I don't want, then, a thing
Tried to be responsible
But it was also a dream
A performance
Just fun
The Lord never smiled
But could say it was good
All in clean conscience